#the stationery hermit speaks

[fishnapple]

Neptune's mode of expression

Random observations about how Neptune expresses itself in my daily life.

My aspects: Neptune as 12th's lord sitting on MC, Neptune aspecting Sun/Moon/Venus/AC

• Confused look (both me and the person looking at me)

• People stare at me, I stare back at them, no change in their gaze. Make me wonder am I an inanimate human being or an animate object.

• People getting startled in elevator when they realised that I was standing in the same elevator with them during the whole ride (context: me alone in the elevator then the other person walked in but only realised my existence when I was about to walk out)

• Spacious bus station but people insist on standing right in front of me, the distance between my nose tip and their back could be measured by the length of one finger. If anyone wants to hire a backstabber (in the literal sense), please contact me.

• "I thought you were a foreigner"

• "You don't seem to have worldly desires"

• "Searching for your home planet?"

• "You walk like a zombie", "Are you walking or floating?"

• People assuming me being innocent and naive, need to be taught without actually talking to me.

• I can guess people's astrological signs through their assumptions of my sign. I had people guessing the whole zodiac for my Sun sign. "Oh you probably are Scorpio or Virgo" can be translated as they having Scorpio or Virgo placements. My ideal career is probably being a mirror or a projector screen.

• My motivation has avoidant attachment style. It ghosts me when I make demand on it.

• The most enjoyable aspect of sleeping is the dreams.

• The most enjoyable aspect of staying awake is daydreaming.

• Hermit is a very attractive word.

• Loud noises, the bane of my existence.

• Having random amusing thoughts then forget about them the next minutes. The past me probably had more fun things to write in this post than the present me.

• Fascination with watery, bubbly, oceanic stuff.

• Liking floaty, lightweight, oversized clothes so I can swim in them.

• The inner happening vs How people perceive it: crying river from the anxiety of public speaking = "oh you look so calm", being sad because I've lost something = "is there something good happening for you?", getting excited about dinner = "Why do you look so down?" *hence the confused look*

• Getting assigned to do the decoration of any project or getting asked whenever there's something remotely artsy needed to be done, like gift wrapping even though I've never shown any sign of being experienced at gift wrapping.

• Perpetually confused about my life path.

• Can cry at everything and nothing.

• Getting introduced to astrology since primary school.

• Messy space means creative mind = The mantra I use to soothe the nagging feeling whenever I see my messy space.

• "Your desk looks like the stationery shop/ witchcraft shop"

And many more observations but they've escaped my clutch.

[chatoyantquill]

Hey bumblebees! So there is a collab in the works for Fibromyalgia Awareness month, but I wanted to make my own separate post for this really quick, because I feel like I need to. Awarness month for Fibro and every Chronic Illness is so incredibly important because many people don’t realize how badly our illnesses effect us. I think that most people think that just because we look fine on the outside, we are not really sick. That could be further from the truth. I am tired. Always. I have a hard time sleeping at night-sometimes I can go several days in a row without even getting one ounce of sleep- I have IBS, my weight can go up and down with the slightest thing, I’m bloated, I have chronic headaches, my feet and hands go numb, I have terrible bouts of depression and anxiety, my feet swell up, I have sensory sensitivities, I have to Pee all the time, I have chronic muscle pain, I have a hard time remembering details and concentrating on even the simplest of tasks. Some days even my scalp is incredibly tender. My back and neck are always stiff and it hurts me to make even the slightest movements. I get irritated easily and I almost always feel uncomfortable in my own body. I want people who don’t think those of us who have Chronic Illness are actually sick, to listen to me. If you had any or all of those symptoms-just even for a day or an hour- wouldn’t you call out of work sick? Wouldn’t you stay in bed with a heating pad and cry? Wouldn’t you want someone to try and help you find a way to stop it? Now just imagine that you had those symptoms every day for the rest of your life! Imagine that no medicine can cure it! Imagine that no matter what medicine or remedy you try, it will never give you permanent relief! Sure, a certain med or a specific remedy or diet may help-for a while. You will always be stuck with pain and the feeling that you are losing a battle. How can you fight your own body? This is what it feels like to be chronically Ill. This is what it feels like to know that there is no cure. This is what it feels like when we are told that we will be fighting a illness that is invisible. This is what it feels like when society has a stigma against us. Yes, it drives us crazy too. Now, I want to address those who are fighting with Chronic Illness, and those who have Fibro like I do. I want you to know that I think you are the strongest person on earth. You are a warrior, and I applaud you for all the things that you do every single day, even if you have to stay in bed. It takes courage do fight like we do, and you are being so brave. I know that it feels like you’re drowning and you feel like you’ve gone insane- you are allowed to feel this way. I think that you are wonderful, and I want you to never stop fighting. Never. Breathe from your gut and know that you are a force of nature. You are allowed to take a rest, to take a break, and to sit and do nothing. Your body needs it. We can do all the things every one else does, we just have to do it in smaller steps. We will get there. You can achieve all of your dreams because that fighter spirit is in you, and you do anything you fucking want. Be a badass; because you are. I love every single one of you, Ash

NOTE: If you have something negative to say, or have a spiteful or ignorant comment, take that shit somewhere else. If you don’t heed my warning, and comment something that is ugly, I will have you blocked. Please be respectful. Mind your manners.

[the---hermit]

Can anyone give me an adivice on a good inexpensive black pen to use for taking notes ?

[southwindscoffee]

new year's day ... in July

After reading (and listening to!) Atomic Habits, I was inspired to actually change some of my habits—drinking more water, eating more protein, actually reading books on my TBR list rather than buying new ones, and so on. For the first half of the year, I used a Clear Journal from Baron Fig to keep track of my days, inspired by that book. I managed to fill up the journal after six months, so I bought another one and started it today. Thus, today feels like a brand-new year, complete with new pens and stationery. Part of starting a new year is to look back on what happened last year and where I want to go now. So this is my half-year review.

 And what a strange first half of 2020 it was. I started with dreams of lifting weights, kicking butt at work, and writing more. What actually happened?

 Until COVID-19 hit, I was actually doing pretty well with going to the gym. I made it my habit to just check in three or four times a week. That was all. An easier habit to establish than “I will work out for an hour every day.” Checking in is easy, and I was taking the advice of optimizing for the starting line, not the finish line. Don’t worry about the results, just worry about beginning the good habit.

 Of course, because I was actually inside the gym, I might as well work out, but there was something about the psychological benefit of a low bar to cross. I worked out often until the gym closed.

 After the gym closed, my bar was low: I simply had to go outside every day and walk to our mailbox at the end of the road, which had two purposes. Maybe three. It meant I wasn’t a hermit staying inside all day. I felt my body move in the sunlight and fresh air. Oh, and I got the mail.

 Now the gym is open and has been for a few weeks. I wanted to let it settle in before I returned. I went back today, and it felt weird to exercise with a mask, so I may need to reevaluate this practice. But I did like lifting weights again. So, no matter what happens for the next six months, patience with external situations and kindness to myself for doing the best I can are the keys.

 At work, similarly, I was doing longer hours at the beginning of the year, trying to arrive earlier and make sure I hit a certain amount of productive time. Transitioning to home has been okay, once I got the hang of it. The only issue was ensuring I had a defined separation between work and home, since boundaries were otherwise obliterated, and this would stress me the hell out. I ended up getting a work-only cell phone number, which helped draw lines, as well as setting up pretty strict work and non-work times. I have a desk and a laptop I use just for work, which also keeps work time just that. A Marie Kondo thing I read about was spraying mint before I work. I like that because with the scent comes a transition. So, while there have been good days and difficult ones, generally I’m doing okay, and I’m pleased with how each little bit of time work adds up.

 Speaking of little bits adding up…

 On writing, I wanted to write 10,000 words a week, which by half-year would be 260,000 words. I made it to more than 270,000, on a variety of projects, including publishing a blog twice a week most weeks. I’m very proud of that. Like everything else, there have been easy writing days and ones where each letter typed is a struggle. But I’m doing it. I’m pleased that I no longer feel the stress of inaction. No more wishing I would write, since I do so. Daily. This makes me very satisfied and happy.

 So, as I look forward, I want to finish some projects and get them out to where readers can enjoy them. (Honestly, part of doing this blog more often is to get the thrill of pushing publish. Sending my thoughts into the ether where they can be judged always scares me.)

 Overall, while this year has been one of public health and profound change in social justice, on my tiny little micro-level, I’m still dreaming of my goals and getting there one check in, one hour, one word at a time.

 What about you?

[ddaenggtan]

forever rain | knj - teaser

Being dead isn't anything exciting. Just a lot of walking the same halls of the same apartment day after day after day. Things change when the new tennant arrives, though. Kim Namjoon isn't anything you could have expected; not the way he's so careful and gentle with his plants because he breaks so many other things, not the way his friends joke that he's psychic because you refuse to let him get in the face one time, and certainly not the way he comes home after literal months spent moving things away from table edges for him and announces that he knows he's being haunted and he has some questions for you. You didn't know ghosts could fall in love, but he makes you feel alive again, like you're standing in the rain while thunder crashes around you. You should've known nothing good would come of falling in love with someone living, though. You should've known that heartbreak was the only way this could end...that the rain doesn't last forever. 

part of the Love Yourself Collab, please please please go check out the other fics. Everyone involved is so freaking talented and I have been vibrating out of my skin with how excited I’ve been to read all of these. 

pairing | kim namjoon x reader (unspecified gender, even!)

genre/warnings | ghost!reader, slight fluff, there are a lot more for the actual fic so definitely read those when it comes out, i’m not kidding i definitely want you to come and yell at me in my ask when you finish it, but pls don’t send things about what happens bc ur mad about it bc u didn’t read the warnings, y’all are a smart bunch but i know firsthand how skipping warnings can punch u in the gut so just,,,,,,,read the warnings on the full fic lmao

a/n | this is just a teaser for the full fic which is gonna post,,,,,,,,,,,,at some point lmao who knows i haven’t actually decided yet!!! yay me!!!! hahahaha stress!! it’ll definitely go up on my ao3 as well, so if you have alerts on for me there, you’ll get notified that way! for now, have this! and don’t kill me when the rest comes out!!

The creak of the front door pulls you from your thoughts, and the echo of a voice makes you narrow your eyes. Your first instinct is to slam some windows to scare off whoever's in your apartment, but you repress the urge. You'd die of boredom if you could die again, and whoever this is could provide a few hours' entertainment at the least.

You pop your head through the bathroom wall to see what's going on, and wow, who let an actual giant into your apartment? Fucking with the pipes could definitely wait for this guy.

"I know it's last minute, yeah," He says into the phone that's held carefully between his cheek and shoulder. His arms are loaded down with boxes and he's angled away from you just enough that you can't see his face, but he's tall and broad and wearing what looks like the world's comfiest sweater, and you want to badly to wrap yourself up in him. "But you know Joon needs the help. Don't pretend you aren't constantly willing to put off your thesis, I know for a fact that you went out to look at stationery with Tae last week, and everyone knows that's the most boring thing on the planet."

He's quiet, listening to the soft crackle of a voice from the other end. You slide through the wall completely, hovering as close as you dare to try and hear what the other person is saying. Tall, Broad, and Comfy scoffs.

"He can stare at one sheet of paper for at least ten minutes, Yoongi. Do I need to remind you of the time he spent an entire fucking hour debating which set of holiday scrapbook to buy because, and I quote, 'this one has the really nice rose pattern on it that would look great with the invitations, but, oh, look at the pinstripes in this one!'" His voice morphs into what you guess is an approximation of whoever Tae is, and you laugh at the high-pitched, nasally tone.

Tall and Broad spins, eyes narrowing as he looks around the room, and fuck, he's literally gorgeous. You've never seen someone more attractive in your life or your death and it would probably knock the wind out of you if you actually had breath. Comfy McGorgeous turns back around and sets the stack of boxes in the corner, continuing his tirade about Tae and stationery while simultaneously trying to talk Yoongi into coming, you assume, to help Joon move. You don't know who any of these people are, but they're already proving to be the most entertaining bunch that's ever graced these walls.

The door to your apartment flies open, making both you and Boyfriend Material whip your head around.

"Christ, Jin, you couldn't hold the fucking door open for us?" Someone grunts. Beauty Von Softness - or, Jin, as you should probably refer to him - winces and strides over to do just that as two more guys stagger in with a couch suspended between them. The second they're in the door they drop it to the ground and flop onto it, panting and sweaty.

"Listen, I was busy trying to get our resident hermit out of his cave to help us carry some of this shit," Jin spits back. "And you all know what it's like getting him out and about."

"Did you tell him that there's pizza after we're done? Because I've found that food is the best motivator for him," the guy closest to the door says. His hair is soft-looking and long and you wish you could pet it.

The other guy, the one who cursed Jin out and has the softest pink hair you've ever seen, laughs. "Jeongguk, you always think the best motivator is food."

"Well, yeah, because it is."

"For you, maybe. Other people require actual rewards."

"But food is a reward," Jeongguk mutters into the fabric of the couch. Jin tsks and smacks As Yet Unnamed on the back of the head.

"You're lucky I hung up on him when you bombarded your way into this place, or he'd definitely not come help us," Jin says as he leans against the back of the couch.

Unnamed starts to say something else but is cut off by someone running straight into the end of the couch. They all shoot to their feet, spouting apologies as the three of them maneuver the couch into the apartment properly.

"Sorry, sorry, Jimin distracted us from properly finishing our job," Jeongguk says quickly. He looks to the stranger with a small apologetic smile, and you're pretty sure if it were humanly possible, there would be actual literal stars in his eyes.

"Oh, it's okay, Jeonggukkie. I should've been looking where I was going." New Challenger walks straight towards where you stand, and you realize seconds before it's too late that he is not aware there is a massive stack of boxes in his path. Instinctively, you shove them to the side with your foot. Tall And Oblivious sets his boxes down without any trouble, none the wiser about any of it, and the three near the couch are too busy bickering in hushed whispers to have noticed you doing anything.

The newcomer straightens and turns to look at them all with a bright smile, and you think you might actually see The Light in the way his cheeks dimple. If you thought the other three were beautiful - which they are, no doubt about that, you're seriously wondering why the hell a bunch of supermodels are moving stuff into your apartment - then this guy is easily an Actual Fucking God or something. His brown hair is soft and shiny, his smile is warmer than the sun, and you're fairly positive that for the first time since you died, you feel goosebumps along your arms.

"Seriously, Namjoon, we should've realized you'd be up soon. You stay, start unpacking while we go get the rest of the furniture." Jimin shoves Jeongguk out the door while he's speaking, ignoring the taller's complaints, and Jin just shakes his head at the sight.

"Yoongi'll be here soon, he's finishing up another draft of his thesis. Hobi and Tae are stopping to get the pizzas and then they'll be here, too." Jin's voice is calmer than it was Jimin and Jeongguk, more soothing, and it makes you curious. Not only because of the tone change, but because you know Hobi, he owns the building and is the one who rented you the apartment when you first moved in. One of your favorite things to do is scare him when he comes by to make sure everything’s ready for a viewing.

"What? No, I said I was gonna pay for pizzas!" Namjoon looks distinctly more upset about this than someone should over not having to pay for pizza, at least in your mind, and it only makes you more curious.

"Yeah, but you also just moved out of your old apartment because it was too expensive, and had like an hour to load everything into a truck, so you're gonna let their trust fund asses pay for pizzas. We're seven adult men, and Guk could eat an entire horse and still be hungry. I'm not letting you pay for that."

Silence hangs in the apartment for a while before Namjoon gives a soft thanks to Jin. They share a smile before Jin makes his way back out. You follow each step, shadowing him all the way to the door before you're stopped. You lean your entire body forward, struggling against the invisible barrier keeping you inside, and the force of it nearly slams you back into the wall when you sag in defeat.

You aren't sure why you try anymore, but you know yourself well enough to admit that you're not going to stop until you can at least make it to the hallway.

[chatoyantquill]

More magical journaling prompts!

Hi bumblebees! It’s been a hot minute since I’ve made a prompt set, huh? Well, here are some magical themed prompts to get the ball rolling again!

1. If you could create a spell to go back and re-live any moment of your past, what would that be?

2. If you had the chance to have a familiar, what would it be?

3. Is there a place that you go to a lot that seems to hold magic? Why?

4. What is your favorite herb? Why?

5. Did you enjoy mythology/fairy tales as a child?

6. If you could create any magical creature, what would it be?

That’s all for now, folks! I promise to have more up soon! If you use them, please tag me so I can see! I hope you enjoy them!

[chatoyantquill]

Hello all! I promised I’d be back with some photos, so here I am! I reached my 100th journal page today and I used the newest member of the quill family; a extra fine Pilot E95S, which writes like a dream!

[chatoyantquill]

A little weekend reminder: Let flowers grow in the darkest parts of your soul.

[chatoyantquill]

Journaling Prompts for the New Year

Hello, bumblebees! Ash here, and I have been in the mood to write up some journaling prompts! As I was thinking about what exactly to give you guys, I was looking through loads of New Year’s Resolutions, an idea struck me! I think that just writing down all of the resolutions that you want, while helpful, isn’t what I wanted to give. I know that just writing it down would never help me; I would forget about it in five seconds! 

So, I thought that what I wanted out of the upcoming year was for myself to begin again. I want to be the person that I need to be, for myself. I need to take better care of myself this year.  I want to have a year where I start to  transform into the very best version of myself! I wanted these prompts to reflect that; I hope these prompts help you all be your best selves, and please enjoy! 

1. Write a letter (However long or short this needs to be) to yourself. Feel free to include every detail that you can think of! This would be the time to list any habits you want to break or introduce, or just have a rant session, if need be. Include why you need to do better for yourself, and what that looks like! 

2. Is there anything that you need to learn more of for the next year? This could be as simple as learning a new skill, or a hobby you have always wanted to try! This could also be learning more patience, or learning to have more independence! Whatever learning would be to you this year! 

3. List ways that you can do self care! And I don’t mean bubble baths or watching your favorite TV show, even though those things are incredibly helpful and important! I mean that list things that you can do to take care of yourself  mentally! This could include saying ‘No’ to others more often, or not being so hard on yourself, or being more independent, or even doing the thing that you are very afraid to do! List those ways here. 

4. For all of you that suffer with chronic illness, like myself, please write about ways that you can better manage your illness! I know that I am not very good at this yet, so one of my goals for next year to learn to let myself rest more! This could include how to better listen to your body, to what kinds of foods would be good for you to try! Also, this would be a good time to write down anything you want to say to your body! Let it know that even though it is very hard, you want to care for it as best you can! 

5. Does the upcoming year have a designated color? How does this color embody what you are trying to accomplish? Include the color in an entry if you would like! What about a word? What would your word of the year be?

Alright, everyone! That’s all the prompts! I know that these are short, but I think that I did what I set out to do! I hope that you all find these useful! If you use them, or just like them, please tag me and let me know! It would make my day! 

All the love I could possibly give, 

Ash

[chatoyantquill]

Journaling Prompts to Know Yourself

Hello my darling bumblebees! I thought that it was time for another journaling prompt set! I’ve gotten very fond of doing these! 

So, I was thinking about what kind of questions to do, and I thought about what kind of questions help me know exactly who I am and how I operate, and I compiled a handful of notes based off things that I ask myself in my journal. 

Note: Please know that these questions are things that I have asked myself, and I know that they have worked for me, but I am a very creative person -my imagination flies around all the time- so if they don’t suit you, then that is okay! I think that (well, I hope) that there are others like me who would benefit from this introspection! 

1. What is the color of your soul? Why? Look at how this color fits with your personality and look at what kind of response your mind has to this color. 

2. What gives you life?

3. How do you communicate best? Verbally? Body language? Through writing? Through painting/drawing? Through music? 

4. If you could be a season, which one would it be? All of them? Or just one? Why? Why is this season(s) so like you? Look for similarities. 

5.  What makes you frightened? Is it a lot of things? Very few? Be specific! Look at how and why and when! 

6. If you could only listen to one song (or album) for the rest of your life, what would it be? 

7. Do you wish on dandelions or bay leaves? What do you wish for? 

8. Is your best friend just like you or the opposite? How does this person help you be yourself?

9. What could someone give you to make you happy?

10. If you could see yourself in the future, what do you hope that you would see? 

That’s all, everyone! Thank you so very much for giving this a look, and as always: Use these as much or as little as you like, and if you do use them, please feel free to tag me! I would love to see them! 

I wish you all the best and I hope that you have the best day possible! 

All of my love, 

Ash 

[chatoyantquill]

Question

I am going to launch my YouTube channel soon, and I was wondering: what should my first video be about?

Is there anything you guys want to see from me? Is there anything you want me to talk about? Any questions? I appreciate any feedback! Let me know!

[chatoyantquill]

Quick Question

@bookmarksandbrushpens and I have been wanting to make our idea of The Order of the Scribes a real thing! Instead of just something that we talk about a lot! We really want to get more into blogging and videos and such and more into the journaling/fountain pen community so we were wondering: 

What would you most like to see The Order of the Scribes be about? 

Is there anything that you want or need? Please let us know! Message either one of us or leave comments! 

Let’s make this a reality! 

[chatoyantquill]

Even though this entry was a couple days ago, this was the word of the day! I acquired some kraft paper, and have really been decorating my journal all over the place with it! 

Also, I have a question for you, bumblebees: If I were to start a YouTube channel, would any of you watch? It’s something that I have wanted to do for a while now, but it makes me very nervous! Of course, the channel would be about journaling, writing prompts, fountain pens, and the like, but I wanted to know your opinions! Feedback is appreciated! Please let me know! 

[chatoyantquill]

Habin with my word for the day!!! He seemed extra cute this morning. @bookmarksandbrushpens and I are up early doing a journaling session. Emma, Habin and I hope that you all are having a wonderful day thus far!!

[chatoyantquill]

Hi everyone! Here is a photo of my current fountain pen collection! I had to do some cleaning and re-inking of a few, so I thought I would take a picture of them all before they had a bath! Apologies if the photo is a little blurry, I couldn’t get the lighting right! 

[chatoyantquill]

Whimsical Journaling Prompts!

So, I’ve been on a fairy tale/mythology kick lately, and I was inspired to create  a handful of whimsical journaling prompts! I think these would be a nice inclusion if you were wanting to include some drawings in your entries, or really cool lettering, or some cool scrap-booking elements! Or, if you are like me, and just really like fairy tales! 

1. If you were a dragon, what would your hoard consist of? 

2. What do you think a changeling would look like? 

3. What would your dream castle look like? 

4. Would you rather save yourself, or have a prince/princess save you? 

5. What is your favorite Fairy Tale? Why? What lessons does it teach? 

6. Do you think that evil queens get a bad rap, or do they get what they deserve? 

7. A witch comes to you in a secluded forest. What does she offer you? 

8. There is an enchanted item in a castle courtyard; what it is? Who can have access to this item? 

9. If you were a ruler of a mythical country/world, how would you reign? 

10.  If you were able to write your own fairy tale, what would it be about? Is there any tales that would inspire your writing?